There was a child fantasy, I was wondering if I would own an island nation with my people, with my language, with my currency, my stamp, my army…… It had been forgotten for years, but it floated up again in these moments while it seems I would never leave it away from me. From the idea of having a frds facebook group for photography events, parties, kart racing or whatever functions for fun, to the idea of having “the place” to create Our space…
Fancy about I could catch everyone, and delight everyone(but beat by the reality).. Fancy about I could create unforgottable suprises(but beat by the responses).. Fancy about it could be growing like a snow ball(but beat by time).. Fancy about it could be a perfect starter(but beat by the end)… Fancy about there were partners could induce undefeatable synergy(but beat by the management)..
It was a sad romance and I’m glad to get experienced.. Nobody will be willing to listen to me say about I’ve learnt this lesson, it has been told too many times with none of effort. Maybe I could say this time is like the 2007, I can walk again alone aind do/try the things I want without any soft resistances. In that year, I let go some and got paces of movements, the problem is still the same, the lack of action point is always my problem. I am always looking for someone to work with, somebody may push me forward or just simply share the good n bad to let me fight against the lonelyness.. Let me quota it big “enterprueus is always a lonely route”. Of coz i’m not going to start an interntioal giant business, but unless I got a partner who really DO work, I have to push myself to gogogo.. If I’m ready to go by myself, I dun need to be messed up on the table with nothing really on it..
I think I’m not living anymore, but a dream is still stringing my soul.. I dun know if this sharing/yelling can help.. But I really do not know what I can do in these moments of waiting/preparing.. For the birth!
Timeline is a tricky thing which indicate a real thing wrong at some means.. I think I can have a better feeling if I care no more about time ‘n ageing.. If there is a time machine to defeat it, the only possible machine I can use is called dream.. Dream is abstract which build the rigid, and that’s why I’m still here..